A Little More Personal: Hello Goodbye

I am getting really good at saying goodbye. TWO YEARS ago today I arrived in California after leaving the only home I’ve ever known in New York. I said goodbye to my parents and my sister and my post college life of uncertainty and moved 3,000 miles across the country. It doesn’t feel like that was two years ago. It feels like two lifetimes ago. So much has changed in those two years; I have a different roommate than the one I moved out here with and a new apartment and have had at least 20 new jobs. That’s what happens when you work freelance. You say yes to everything everything, you say hello for a little while, and then you say goodbye. It happens, you get used to it, you move on.

Except this August I broke the rules. Like a whore who falls in love I took a job that wasn’t a one day gig or an award show with an end in sight. I started working on a talk show. Now, talk shows can be, for some, the holy grail of freelancing . For the most part the subject matter is light and fun, they are usually off in the summer which allows for freedom and ability to travel, and they can last for years which means stable work. Unless your show gets canceled. Or in my show’s case, not renewed for a second season. Then that’s a whole other story. This story.

Now, my show wasn’t canceled right away. It was canceled at a date in the future and we had to continue working on it until then #BecauseTelevision. It’s basically like being a lame duck president, you know that nothing you do can change the inevitable end, but you’re not just going to sit there. So you continue to make awesome TV and have crazy ideas and be inspired by the badass people around you because (almost) everyone is going down with the show like the band on the Titanic.

So now my show has ended. I made it through to the very end. I am so proud that I got to be a part of it and the work I got to do. This is the reason I moved to California two years ago: to make television, to work at a studio. For the first time in my career I wasn’t driving to a new set everyday and trying to remember everyone’s name, I was seeing the same familiar faces everyday and driving onto a lot with a stage and a desk. My desk.

And I wasn’t just emptying trashes or refilling the refrigerator with diet cokes (although that’s arguably one of the most important jobs on any set), I was casting and doing research and updating budgets and ordering props and attending meetings and rehearsals and learning from everyone around me. For a person like me (I’m really starting to think I’m a Ravenclaw, but that’s a post for another day), a job where I can use my brain and have actual responsibilities is the dream. I love the feeling of accomplishment and that the work I did actually contributed to the show in some way.

And then I had to say goodbye. This goodbye was tough because it wasn’t, “That was a hard day, we’ll call you if we need you next week” kind of goodbye. It was a, “We’ve celebrated birthdays and Christmas and firings and the ratings roller coaster and now it’s all over” kind of goodbye. It’s goodbye to my longest and most fulfilling job thus far with some of the hardest working, coolest people I have met.

But again, I’m getting used to goodbyes. Yes, I cried and yes I am sad and yes have NO idea what I’m doing next, but what else is new. No show lasts forever. Not even Oprah. Every show I have worked on has been an experience, a step towards where I want to be, a lesson in saying goodbye. And I am thankful.

Now it’s time for the next one.

Oh since I usually end these posts with a song, here’s one thanks to Lin-Manuel Miranda and Hamilton.

A Little More Personal: ONE YEAR LATER

One year.

365 days.

525,600 minutes.

That is how long I have lived in California.

Where did the time go?

It seems like just yesterday my friend (now roommate/soul sister) and I hopped into my car and drove cross country with no plan, a few suitcases of clothes, and a vague idea of what life would be like on the golden shores of Cali. In my original blog post about my decision to come to California I called it a, “work-cation, half work and half vacation, since it’s not a permanent move.”

Oops.

This has become way more than a vacation. California has become the place where I live and work. The place where I own furniture and have registered my car. Recently I traveled to Texas to work on the Academy of Country Music Awards and when asked, “Where are you from?” 9 times out of 10 I replied, “Los Angeles.” I have gone home to New York three times now and each time I bring back more stuff (including all of my Harry Potter books) to make my apartment more homey. Honestly I’m not sure if I ever thought I would come back, but if I had thought that at the time it would have been almost impossible to get in my car and drive away.

A year ago I was struggling. I couldn’t find a job. I wasn’t happy. I was living at home wanting only to go back to college because I missed my friends. I needed a change of scenery and a kick in the pants. California was exactly what I needed and nothing like I expected.  I found not only the change of scenery I was looking for and many, different jobs, but along the way I changed. I became independent. Stronger. Braver. Happier. A little bit tanner and blonder.

Living 3,000 miles away from home has taught me some very important lessons. That family is everything and you should appreciate every moment you get to spend with them. That technology is amazing because when you can’t be there you can at least Facetime sing happy birthday to your sister at midnight. I have learned that friends are the family you choose and that it is best to choose friends from Texas because they love to cook and share their food with you.

I think the most important thing I’ve learned though is that it is okay to ask for help. I call my parents daily to ask everything from how to best clean my bathroom to why my car is making weird noises. I ask my friends for rides to the airport and if they’ve lived in California longer than me for the best places to eat and drink. 95% of the jobs I’ve had came about because I emailed a co-worker and asked if they needed someone for their next show. I have never  been very good on telling people what I need, but I am getting better. You need people to survive in this world, especially in a strange place. More than ever I have come to understand that the saying, “It takes a village to raise a child” is very easily applied to adults too.

As much as I have learned this adventure has not all been easy. This is the furthest I have ever lived from home. I get homesick all the time, most days it seems to come out of nowhere. The worst part of homesickness is that there is no cure. It hits you in the gut and the only thing you can do is wait for it to pass. Another problem is the physical distance itself. Lately my grandmother has been in and out of the hospital and there is nothing worse than feeling helpless because I am on the other side of the country. Those are the worst days. The days where I cry and question what I am doing with my life and why I moved all the way out here. Sometimes I wonder if I should move back. But then my mom tells me how proud she is of me or I tell someone the story of how I moved out here and watch the awed expression on their face or I stand next to Chris Evans backstage at an award show or I do my taxes on my own and I know I made the right decision. Moving away from home is hard, it’s the hardest thing I’ve done so far, but it has been worth it.In one year California has already brought me so many amazing things. I can only begin to imagine what this next year will bring. Whatever comes, I’ll be ready for it, armed with my family and my friends and a newfound appreciation of what it means to find a home.

Los Angeles, I’m yours.

A Little More Personal: 2015 is My Year

Every year I make a New Year’s resolution to blog more and yet here I am, 15 days into the 2015 with nothing to show for myself. But I have a good reason. I’ve been busy. Really busy. As in work-go-home-shower-sleep-and-do-nothing-else busy. My dad’s birthday was 10 days ago and his card is still in my purse. (Sorry Dad!) But I like being busy, especially since it is because I have been working. On the Golden Globes.

If you would have asked me last year at this time if I could have imagined a life where I live in California and work on my favorite awards shows I would have said, “No, that’s not possible.” But here I am. In California for NINE MONTHS now and quite literally living my dreams. It is the most surreal experience, one that I still don’t believe actually happened to me. The show itself passed by in a blur of faces I had previously only watched on my television screen. The only sad part to me was missing out on actually watching including every bit with Tina and Amy, but it more than made up for it when they walked by me on their way off the stage at the end of the night.

All of this makes me realize  how completely lucky I am (a word I would have never previously would have used to describe myself) and how hard I have worked to get here. This isn’t a #humblebrag. This is an actual brag. I have worked hard, I have pushed myself, and I am proud of where I am going and where I have been. And I shouldn’t ashamed to say it. 2015 is already off to a great start (broken resolutions aside) and I plan on taking every opportunity that this new year brings.

Other things that are great about 2015 so far? Galavant, a show I knew I would like, but I didn’t know I would like SO MUCH. I haven’t laughed that hard in awhile. There are so many little in jokes and pop culture shout outs (John Stamos’ character is named SIR JEAN HAMM for goodness sake). It’s a show that would be great as it is, but is made even better by the addition of musical numbers. Psych fav Timothy Osmond is hilarious and Joshua Sasse is easily one of my new TV crushes. For sure the only good thing about Sundays.

I have also been catching up on a bunch of nominated films including Boyhood (great concept, but didn’t love it overall), Whiplash (LOVE LOVE LOVE, I could watch that final scene over and over again), Into the Woods (one word: “Agony”, the song not the emotion), and The Theory of Everything (Very Good, loved the music but don’t have much else to say).

2015 has a lot of great things in store (and I don’t just mean Avengers: Age of Ultron). I am excited to see what this year brings both in pop culturally and in my life. Either way, I’ll write about (probably months after it happens, but you know, I’m doing the best I can).

Final Words

• Because I now work on award shows I will no longer be posting my nomination reactions. I know you’re all veryyy upset, but it is something I just decided would be for the best for now.

TV Notes:

• I can’t wait to watch Agent Carter. Like I said, I’ve been VERY BUSY, but I plan on watching it the second I have time (aka this weekend). Same goes for the Duplass brothers’ Togetherness. 
• The final season of Parks and Rec started this week and I still can’t bring myself to watch it because the faster I watch it the sooner it will be over.
• I’m finally catching up on the end of White Collar and WOW is it good. The second half of season 5 has been insane which only makes me more excited for what season 6 and the finale will bring.

P.A. Life: Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Being Freelance

Recently I’ve been writing a lot about my life in California, but I realize a lot of my family/friends/readers don’t know what it is that I actually came out here to do. I think I’ve mentioned before that I am a production assistant, but many people don’t know what that even means. I get asked, “What do you actually do?” on a daily basis. I’ve been trying to write the answer to that question in several posts, but it never seems to fit anywhere. Here are all the answers to some frequently asked questions like,”What is a production assistant?” and “Why don’t you just get a real job?”

What is a production assistant?

A production assistant is the lowest person on a film/TV set. Coffee running low? Need someone to stand in as the lighting department fixes the lights? Have paperwork to fill out/copies to be made/a chair that needs moving/an overflowing garbage? Ask a PA, those are all things we do. In the most basic terms, a PA is the extra set of hands that does the jobs that are essential for the rest of the crew to get the project made, but that the higher ups are too busy to do. We do anything and everything that’s asked of us. Seriously.

Okay, so what do you do all day?

There is no typical day as a PA. It depends on what type of project you are working on and what your role is. On an “average” day I will go on runs (meaning going out and purchasing/picking up anything that’s needed on set from food to wigs to cardboard boxes), restock the kitchen (film crews can eat), move something heavy (there is always something heavy to move), and help any department that needs assistance (could be the camera, lighting, or art departments or even a producer or director who needs an extra hand). Like I said before, my job is to assist everyone else. It’s right there in my title. Sometimes I’ll get to do side projects of my own like research or writing.

Is that stuff any fun?

It can be! The fun part about being a PA is that everyday is different. There is always something new to learn and someone new to meet. Being a PA allows you interact with almost everyone else on the crew, many of whom started out their careers as a PA. You gotta start somewhere, right?

As a PA I have worked on some pretty cool shows. My first ever gig was on the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade where I got to stand in Herald Square and see all of the performers and balloons come by. I’ve also worked on the Christmas Tree Lighting in Rockefeller Plaza, the season 14 finale of American Idol, a talk show called Just Keke, and a few reality shows. I’ve loved them all for different reasons. To me the best part is seeing all the hard work and the little pieces come together. That moment right before a show starts (especially a live one) is magical because anything can happen. (What you hope happens is the show goes off without a hitch.)

That all sounds great…what’s the catch?

Being a PA is fun, but it is also A LOT of work. The average day is 12.5 hours. This ain’t no 9-5 job so say goodbye to your social life. You will be exhausted pretty much every single day. Being a PA can also be very physical. There are tables and chairs to move, boxes to carry, sets that need to come up and down. When a show is over PAs have to help with load out which means taking EVERYTHING that was brought in has to come out so the next show or whatever can come in. So all of office supplies, computers, hair and makeup products, food, you name it, it must be moved. During load out you will not go home and eat. You will go home and fall into your bed and maybe wake up in time for work the next morning.

Another not so fun part? No job security.  Shows/films/commercials end. Or sometimes they get canceled. Or decide to go on strike. You could be employed one day and unemployed the next.

Wow that sucks.

Yeah it can suck, I get major anxiety every time a show ends and I don’t have another job lined up. But you know what would suck to me more? Working 9-5 in an office  and staring at a computer all day. I love being able to move around to different projects. Earlier this week I finished a show one day and the next day I was working on the Primetime Emmys. Not too shabby.

You don’t have a set job so why can’t you just take vacation/come home whenever you want?

The nature of production is very fast paced. If things are happening they are happening tomorrow or right now. If I leave, I can’t work and I will be replaced. It’s as simple as that. Since I don’t have a “normal”  job I could be unemployed tomorrow or I could be booked for the next 2 months, but I won’t know until that phone rings.

Also, each day of production relies on the day before so when I am working and you want to hang out with me be prepared to make plans at the very last minute.

I get out late, I work early, I’m usually tired. Sometimes I don’t even know what time or if I’m working the next day. And if there’s a problem a shoot will run late or the scenes will have to be completed the next day. This can change everyone’s schedule. That’s just the way it is. There are a lot of little parts that depend on other little parts and sometimes these things can’t be helped. Hence, no social life.

Is there anything else we should know about your life as PA?

Wow thanks for asking such good questions. Sure there is. Please stop asking me when I’m going to get a real job.

This is my real job. My hours may be unconventional, I may spend my days sweeping glitter and counting walkie talkies and worrying if we have enough red vines, but this is what I do. I won’t always be a PA, but there’s a good chance that as long as I stay in this industry my life will always be like this. This is the business we’ve chosen. But it also means I get to go to the Emmys so that’s a trade off I’m willing to make.

This is the most basic of description of what a PA does so if you have any other questions don’t hesitate to ask. I am in no way an expert, but I can share my stories and experiences. It’s an important job that I feel like more people should know about (and yes that has 110% to do with the fact that it is my job and me who is doing it)!

P.S. If you happen to be reading this and need a PA, I’m available.

A Little More Personal: Time Spent in Los Angeles

So A LOT has happened since my last post about my life in California. 3 more months have gone by making this my fourth month living in California. I cannot even begin to explain how surreal that is to type. Four month is a lifetime. It’s a high school relationship. So much can happen in that amount of time and really so much has happened in that amount of time. The one major change since my last post?  NO MORE COUCH SURFING. That’s right,I actually have a permanent California address. I live in the Valley, which means I’m actually a Valley Girl.

(If you care, living in “The Valley” means that when you are looking at the hills, you see where the Hollywood sign should be, but not the letters themselves, the backs of them. Basically it’s like living in Long Island or maybe even Brooklyn without the hipsters, you can go to/see Manhattan, but you don’t actually live there.)

So I’m an adult now.

I pay rent. And bills. Too many bills. I cook for myself. Or I eat cereal. I still don’t have a bed because buying a mattress scares the crap out of me and its expensive, but these things take time. It was just a few weeks ago that my roommate and I were eating our meals off cardboard boxes  and having our friends sit on the floor when they came to visit us. We just got a couch and a table and even had a bonafide trip to Ikea. I can’t believe how far we’ve come. With every experience, I have proven to myself more and more that, yes I can do this. As much as I’ve cried and struggled (and still cry and struggle), I am making it. I am quite literally living my dreams and at the same time doing things I never dreamed possible. If you had asked me earlier this year if I saw myself not only moving cross country, but finding work and making friends and having a place of my own (with a pool) I would have say no way Jose.

All of this living on my own has really made me both appreciate and miss my parents. I finally understand why my dad constantly yelled at us for leaving the lights on or why my mom always wanted us to be just a little neater. Having your own place is a lot of work! It makes me realize all of the things I took for granted. Not to get all PSA-ey on everyone, but if you live at home or anywhere within driving distance of your parents, appreciate it. Don’t just call, visit them. The thing I miss the most about home is not pizza or Dunkin Donuts or free laundry, but just sitting and talking/laughing/joking with my family. Sure that sounds sappy, but living 3,000 miles away from the people you love can do that to you.

Other than missing my family and furnishing my apartment I’ve been spending a lot of time working which is alway good. I don’t like sitting still and more than anything I hate being bored. Recently I’ve spent my time working on several different shows. I worked on a talk show for a little while and recently I’ve been on a reality competition show. I’ve enjoyed the reality show because I’ve been able to see the entire season of the show from start to finish which I find fascinating. People may knock reality TV, but a lot goes into making it all come together. There are challenges to plan and contestants to watch over and eliminations to be had. It’s all be great fun.

Next up in my life? Looking for the next project and the project after that, finally making that big bed purchase, and counting down the days until Christmas when I can finally go home and see my family and friends (127).

I’ll end this post with a little list…

California Favs:

• Malibu

I really can’t say enough about it. Every beach I’ve been to is prettier than the next.

• Hiking. Yeah it really is that good here.
• Thai food. Seriously some of the best I’ve ever eaten.
• In-N-Out. Completely lives up to the hype and then some.
• Catered meals. If you work at all in production you will understand what a gift that is. If you don’t it basically means someone provides a hot lunch for you on set. No pb&j for this girl. (Wow a lot of these involve food)
• Making friends with other transplants who also work in production and have no family/other friends close by and so we all live the struggle together.

California Un-favs:

• The fact that the L.A. Kings beat my NY Rangers and now I have to listen to everyone pretend to care about hockey for another season (compounded by the fact that Kings tickets are now RIDICULOUSLY expensive and I will never again be able to see a hockey game live)
• Traffic. Where are you all going at 9 am on on Saturday??
• Parking. Paying for parking, actually parking, not finding parking. (Yes, I have officially become one of those people.)
• Chinese food. Those are not egg rolls, those are spring rolls. All I want is a crispy shelled deliciousness. Is that too much to ask?
• Bills.
• Being this close to Comic-Con and missing it (this year at least).
• Not having any good celebrity sightings (besides Lance Bass).

Oh and here’s the song that inspired the post title:

Track by Track: Ultraviolence

Don’t ask me what it is, but I have a soft spot  for Lana Del Rey. I remember hearing “Video Game” and “Summertime Sadness” when they first came out and thinking that nothing on the radio sounded remotely similar. She is a performer in the way of Marina Diamandis of Marina and the Diamonds: a talented singer able to put on a persona that makes fun of the music she’s making while selling it at the same time. She has a “good girl gone bad”/ “I-don’t-play-by-the-rules” vibe which has gained her both supporters and haters alike. When the track list for Ultraviolence was released articles and social media sites sprung up both criticizing her choices (Rolling Stone called them “absurd”) and praising her for her unique edge. I loved each title and have had the the single “West Coast” on repeat since it was released.

I have been looking forward to this album, Ultraviolence, which was released last week on June 13th, but I am only getting around to listening to in full now. If you don’t like Lana you probably never will, but for those of us who want to celebrate summer with an album that sounds like it comes out of a 1950’s soundtrack, this is just what we’ve been waiting for.

1. Cruel World

There’s no doubt Lana’s voice sounds good on this song in a haunting and faraway way, but I’m not sure if this is the strongest song to start the album off with. Then again, when it was over it still lingered in my head. I think all of Lana’s songs warrant more than one listen because they are so complex especially once you really take time to listen to the lyrics.

2. Ultraviolence 

This song is one of those typical Lana songs that is much deeper than it appears on the surface, although the title does give it away a little more than usual. I love the way she drags out the singing of the word “Ultraviolence.” This song feels slick and dangerous which I think is appropriate considering the subject matter (“He hurt me but it felt like true love”/”He hit me and it felt like a kiss”).

Favorite line: He used to call me DN/That stood for deadly nightshade/Cause I was filled with poison/But blessed with beauty and rage

3. Shades of Cool 

I can imagine girls in poodle skirts and guys in bowling shirts slow dancing to this song in a high school gymnasium straight out of the 1950’s. That’s what I love so much about Lana’s music, she paints a picture with each song that you can clearly visualize upon listening. The song may be slow, but there’s a good beat and an awesome section with an electric guitar. There may be a vulnerability in her voice in this song more than her others, but there is still that feeling that this girl is someone you don’t want to mess with.

4. Brooklyn Baby

This song sounds most like the Lana I know and love. It’s half ode, half mockery of Brooklyn, the place that has become synonymous with hipsters, $5 coffee, and microbreweries. I can tell that this will be one of the songs I listen to most frequently this summer besides “West Coast” and that’s mostly just because I live in California now.

Favorite lines: Yeah my boyfriend’s pretty cool/But he’s not as cool as me/Cause I’m a Brooklyn Baby

5. West Coast

I have been listening to this song since it was released and so far it is my favorite on the album. Maybe it’s because I’m a west coast girl now and this song fits so well with my image of driving around Los Angeles, especially on the way out of the city and heading to the beach. (Mostly Venice Beach that is.) It’s most definitely a sexy song and I enjoy the sprinkling of Spanish lyrics.

Favorite lines: Down on the West Coast, they got their icons/Their silver starlets, their Queens of Saigon/And you’ve got the music, you’ve got the music in you, don’t you?

6. Sad Girl

The way this track list is going so far these could be chapters in my autobiography.

After the high of “West Coast”, “Sad Girl” is a little bit of a let down. I am actually having trouble thinking of anything to say about it and when it ended I forgot it. It’s okay, most albums have one of these and who knows, maybe when I listen to the album through again (as soon as I’m done with this post) it may grow on me.

7. Pretty When You Cry

This song is an interesting look at a relationship. Rather than the typical “girl love boy, boy loves someone else” it’s “girl loves boy, boy loves drugs more.” And while the girl loves the boy, she also seems okay with knowing she’s weak and that the relationship is toxic. It’s a subject that could become un-relatable , but Lana takes it to that place of “girl, I’ve been there too.”

Favorite lines:  I’m pretty when I cry/Don’t say you need me when/You leave and you leave again/I’m stronger than all my men/Except for you

8. Money Power Glory 

A lot of people dislike Lana’s music because they feel she is untalented and only after fame. I like how she uses this song to acknowledge that she knows what people think and doesn’t care. She’s making a statement about the lifestyle she supposedly represents and what it says about our culture. I feel like this song could be a response to Lorde’s “Royals”; we may never be royals, but deep down we all want the same things.

9. Fucked My Way to the Top

Another self aware song, but this one is more in your face and fun. Love her or hate this is Lana’s show and we are all just  a part of it. The opening line alone (which happens to be my favorite) shows that she knows it’s all a game. One she truly knows how to play. (She is famous after all.)

Favorite lines: Life is awesome, I confess/What I do, I do best/You got nothing, I got tested/And I’m best, yes

10. Old Money

I love the sound of this song, the piano, the stripped down layered vocals, the sadness. Compared to the last two songs which were all about recognizing and celebrating her persona, this song seems the most personal and real. Or as real as we can get with Lana. She is still painting a picture, but it is one we can related to much more closely than her world of “dope and diamonds” from “Money Power Glory.”

11. The Other Woman

I have seen it quoted that Lana describes herself as “gangsta Nancy Sinatra” and when I heard this song I understood why. I could see this being in a Tarantino film, even though I have a feeling he’s not a Lana fan (don’t ask me why). It’s the shortest of the songs on the album and a breath of fresh air.

12.Black Beauty 

Another swaying song. This sounds more commercial than the typical Lana, but that’s not a bad thing. This album has a lot of different sounds while still maintaining her overall vibe.

Favorite lines: Life is beautiful but you don’t have a clue/Sun and ocean blue/Their magnificence, it don’t make sense to you

13. Guns and Roses

Another good groovy song with a nice beat. The lyrics are not as complex as some of the other songs, but not every one of them has to be a master piece. Sometimes you just need a song celebrating guys who love guns and roses. (And maybe the band too.)

Favorite lines: I should’ve learned to let you play/I wasn’t the marryin’ kind/I should’ve done it anyway

14. Florida Kilos 

I love the way this song starts out, it sounds so different from everything we’ve heard so far. It’s another song that paints a picture of the glamours fast life of drugs and money. I can almost picture what the video of this song might look like if it happens: awash in gold with lots of palm trees, convertibles, and Lana wearing killer shades and curls.

Note: There are 2 songs, one on the i-Tunes bonus version and one on the Japanese bonus version, that I have not listened to. I only listened to what is currently streaming on spotify.

Summer ’14, I’m ready for you.

A Little More Personal: California Girl

It has been a little over a  month since my big move from New York to California. (If you want to read more about my roadtrip to get here and all the adventures along the way check out my short lived travel blog.)

It still feels so surreal, most days I can’t believe I’m actually here. Besides London and Paris, Los Angeles is a place I have dreamed about visiting for most of my life. And now I’m living here. And by living I mean couchsurfing because I don’t have an actual place of my own yet. All of my clothes are in the trunk of my car. I get dressed by the side of the road half the time and I’m pretty sure that everyone in the neighborhood thinks I’m homeless. (They wouldn’t be wrong.) But when I’m not freaking out about my lack of place to live and getting spammed by Craigslist creeps, I’m appreciating how lucky I am to have friends that will take in both me AND my roommate and a good chunk of our stuff. It’s been an adventure not only working, but also bouncing from place to place.

And yes, you read that right: I have been working! Not all the time/everyday, but enough to keep me happy and eating (which keeps me happy). I worked on the Muscular Dystrophy Telethon which will air in August and was the first show I have worked on for a really great cause. I also got to see Fall Out Boy perform and the 7th grader inside of me was very excited. I did one day on a dating game show pilot. And this past week has been the American Idol finale and preparations for next season. This upcoming week should see some time for me on the Last Comic Standing finale. It sounds cliche, but I do feel so #blessed for all of the opportunities I have had for work out here so far. As one of my friends put it:

“In order to get a job in L.A. you have to be here. You can’t sit in NY thinking about it, you just up and do it. And hope for the best and in your guys case so far so good.”

He’s right! And he’s a big reason my roommate and I came out here in the first place and the reason we had a place to live for a little while and jobs. I spent so much of my time saying “what if?” and for once in my life I am finally finding out.

Sure there have been bad days. I’ll admit I cried on set.  A lot of people saw the puffy faced aftermath. I had to call my mom from a bathroom stall. I still don’t have a place to live or a permanent job or a date of when I will go home next. I miss my family and friends immensely. But I also really love it here. The good days are really good. I have new (mostly fellow production assistant) friends. I have gone hiking almost every weekend and I have gone to the beach twice and only gotten really badly sunburned one of those times. I am finding my way around places. I am learning to drive like everyone else which is to say crazily, but safely.  I thank my lucky stars for all the time I spent on the Long Island Expressway because as much as I hate that highway with all my being, it prepared me for the traffic and the assholes. (The “He who hesitates is lost” rule my dad always preaches is definitely in effect when driving ANYWHERE in L.A.)

Don’t ask me why everyone drives so crazy in L.A. or why there is SO MUCH TRAFFIC ALL THE TIME. There are a lot of things about this place that confuse me. Like why every town has streets with the same name. There is an Alameda Street and an Olive Ave and a Beverly Boulevard EVERYWHERE. I don’t know how people get anywhere or end up in the same place. Other things I find funny about this place? How everyone (or almost everyone I’ve met) has a script in progress. Or the fact that I’ve done more juice runs than Starbucks runs. Or that there no Dunkin Donuts and the only places you can get “a slice” are New York style pizzerias and people there haven’t heard of things like Buffalo chicken pizza. Believe me, I could go on all day about the east coast/west coast divide.

For now, however, I am just taking it one day at a time and trying to let it all sink in. There are still so many things I want to do (like go to the LACMA and Griffith Park Observatory and the El Capitan theater) and food I want to try (like every taco truck and Korean BBQ) and shows I want to work on (like Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D and Top Chef and the Emmy Awards) so it looks like I am here to stay (for the time being). If you want to imagine what I am doing between this post and my next one picture me scouring Craigslist for an apartment, waiting for game 7 to see who my NY Rangers will be facing in the Stanley Cup, and working my butt off to find the next gig (and the next gig and the gig after that).

Until then, here’s another California post ending song:

40 Days of Blogging: The Conclusion

When I started out on this 40 Days of Blogging journey I did not know two things:

1. Lent is a period of 40 days WITHOUT counting Sundays meaning either I should have given myself off on Sundays or that I should have really been writing for 46 days. That would’ve been nice to know as I was labeling these posts because I kept getting VERY confused about the numbering.
2. I would be going to California, leaving before Easter Sunday and therefore technically not blogging for the full period of Lent.

What I did know is that I made a promise to myself to write a post every day for 40 days. And for 38 days now I have kept that promise (minus yesterday because I was busy packing for my trip and visiting family). I have to say I am proud of myself for completing my goal. I know I technically did not make it to the big 4-0, but that was not by choice. I would keep writing everyday if I could, but I have adventures waiting for me out west and so it is with a tiny bit of sadness and a feeling of accomplishment that I write my last of my 40 Days of Blogging posts.

This experience has been more rewarding than I could have ever imagined. I have gained new followers, had people “like” and share my posts, and have thought of something new to write about each day without making myself fall asleep. More importantly, I have gained confidence in my writing abilities. My writing is the one thing I have always been something I am confident about because (luckily) writing  has always come easily to me. I was the girl who was confused by people who complained about having 3 page papers to write. I took a creative writing class for fun. I WAS AN ENGLISH MAJOR FOR GOSH SAKES. However, 9 times out of 10 I still find myself plagued with doubt especially when it comes to posting my writing online. Sometimes I don’t write reviews to movies or shows I watch because I think, “What’s the point?” If the film I want to write about has been out for weeks or years why I would even bother writing something other tons of people already have opinions on? Specifically those people with more experience and intelligence than me.

However, this project forced me to share my opinions. If I didn’t have to think of a new topic to write about every day I guarantee you that around 75% of these posts wouldn’t have been written. But  they were and people read them (shocker of all shocks). I proved, mostly to myself, that my opinion matters. And honestly I don’t care that some of my posts had 6 readers and that some had 65, what matters most to me is that I had the courage to put it out there despite my previous misgivings.

I know going forward onto day 41 and 65 and even further into the future that I will be more willing to put my thoughts into writing. If you know me, even just via twitter, then you know I have A LOT to say (and if you know me in person I apologize because you know A LOT doesn’t even begin to cover it). I also know that I will try and not just write movie reviews in the future, but continue posting about books and music and lists and a more personal things particularly with this new, west coast chapter of my life beginning.

40 Days of Blogging may be done, but I’m not going anywhere. Well, except to California. This blog will still exist…just maybe after a short break. As always, thanks for reading, following, tweeting, liking, and sharing. Keep an eye out for my next post which will more likely than not be brought to you from another time zone!

Final Word

• There may have been a few days where I posted after 12 am and then edited the date/time so it looked like it was posted at 11:59…

 

Pop Culture Catch Up: California Version

So now that I am going to California there are a few things I need to do before I go. Sure, there’s packing and planning my route and avoiding saying goodbye to my friends and family, but most importantly I have to pop culturally prepare myself for life in the Sunshine State…wait that’s Florida. (Note to self: California is the Golden State.) Here are some famous movies, TV shows, and books set in California that I need to catch up on. Maybe once I actually move I can check some of the items on this list and compare them with my experiences. Also, keep in mind since I haven’t seen anything on this list yet, what I have learned about California so far comes from Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, Monk/Psych (both of which had episodes/entire seasons shot in Canada), and Brink!

TV:

The O.C. (2003-2007)

Gossip Girl is to NY what The O.C. is to California. Young, rich, beautiful people and their drama filled love lives all with a backdrop of indie hits? Count me in. Plus, even without seeing an episode I know that I would fall in love with Seth Cohen. He married Blair Waldorf in real life, what could be cuter?

Entourage (2004-2011)

I have been wanting to watch Entourage for some time now because I know I would love it. It is a show  about friends trying to make it in the media industry AKA the reason I am moving to California…except for the fact that I have no acting ambitions. I love the idea of a show about making movies, trying to make it in the industry, and living in L.A. in general. Out of all the things on this list there is a high probability that I will start this before anything else.

Movies 

The Maltese Falcon (1941)

I dislike the fact that I have not seen this film already, especially since it has all of my favorite things: the debonaire Humphrey Bogart, a femme fatale, and a film noir style. When I am not thinking of CA as a sunny paradise, I sometime imagine it as a fog filled, black-and-white city full of adventure, crime, and mystery. This film probably won’t help that idea.

Chinatown (1974) 

Sadly I know nothing about the water crisis that inspired this film. What I do know is that it stars Jack Nicholson, it won a ton of awards, and it features the famous and oft quoted final line, “Forget it Jake, it’s Chinatown.”  I’m really glad I don’t know much more than that because I really want to see this film for myself.

Fast Times at Ridgemont High (1982)

When I think about the people who live in California I think of two things: surfer guys and valley girls. And since I’ve already seen Clueless and Legally Blonde, it is time for me to watch the film that stars one of the most famous surfer/slackers, Jeff Spicoli. I also hear it captures pretty well what it is like growing up in the 80’s…something I sadly was not alive to see. Good thing there are so many great films about the subject.

Endless Summer (1966)

After reading the Vanity Fair article about the now infamous Endless Summer  movie poster I became interested in seeing the film. I have no illusions that I will be any good at surfing, but I admire those who are and the skill and dedication that it takes despite the seemingly laid back lifestyle surfers seem to possess. Also, it is one of the most influential documentaries of all time.

Books 

The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck

Somehow I have a degree in English, but have never had to read this classic Depression era tale by Steinbeck. While he may not be one of my favorite writers, I feel like it is important novel to read. It is about about America in a certain time and place in history, but one that may not be as long ago and far away, or as different from our own, as we would like to believe.

The Mailroom: Hollywood History from the Bottom Up by David Rensin

This book could really be any story about the same subject, this is just the one that happened to be saved on my Goodreads page. I love reading anything about Hollywood, whether it is about the Golden Age or today. There is something thrilling learning the stories behind how films get made and the things people in the crew go through to be a part of them. Another title that could go here is The Prince, The Showgirl, and Me: Six Months on the Set with Marilyn and Olivier by Colin Clark, the book that the film My Week with Marilyn (2011) was based on. As well as countless others

This is only a VERY SMALL list of  CA pop culture I have to catch up on, my lists are always growing faster than my ability to watch/read things. Despite that fact, I’m always open to new suggestions!